Chapter 2 ~ Early Grief
This year as I sat with my feelings, I noticed them circling around me, waiting for their turn. It’s almost like they trust me now, so they can wait quietly until I am ready for them.
10 Lessons I Learned from my Grief Journey
Grief is not linear I used to think that I would move through each stage of grief progressively. When I completed one stage, I would move to the next, never to return again. Grief is nothing like that. It is messy and chaotic. Especially in the early days, we can be all over the place. [...]
A Lesson From My Granddaughter
Living close to my son and his family means I get to watch my granddaughter Arya’s growth and development. At a little over 1 year old, she is currently learning to walk. I’ve watched her progress over the last several weeks, first pulling herself up with both hands and walking along from chair to chair, [...]
My Book
After I began helping others to navigate their grief, I thought to myself, “This is the life I was meant to live”; referencing the message I heard shortly after Leah died that said, Losing Leah is too high a price to pay to not live the life you were meant to live. About this time, [...]
What Does Healing From Grief Look Like?
I’m often asked what it means to heal from grief. It’s a question I’ve pondered for over 20 years, and I’m not sure even now I know what it means. We hear often that “Time heals all wounds.” Time by itself isn’t the only factor; it’s what you do with that time that makes the [...]
What Inspires Me?
When I saw this question as a prompt my first thought was, “No one will be interested in that.” Then I realized that quite often, my first thought is an attempt to avoid a place that feels too vulnerable. I wondered why I felt vulnerable writing about what inspires me. My biggest inspiration is my [...]
Full Spectrum of Feelings
I’m often asked how I can be joyful and live the life I am living when I’m doing it without my daughter’s presence in my life. I’m asked if I have gotten over her death, or if I’ve healed and accepted her death. I will never get over Leah’s death. I’ve had a 20-year [...]
Nuances of Perfectionism
When I was preparing to move from Raleigh to St. Paul in the fall of 2020, there was a lot of purging of things we no longer needed. Some of these were easy to pack in boxes and take to places that were accepting donations. Then I came across my journals. In the course [...]
Another Side of Grief
It’s been 8 months since we’ve moved to St. Paul from Raleigh, NC. We moved here to be closer to my son and his family. Our granddaughter Ayra was born in July of 2020, and after we met her, we knew that we wanted to be a part of her everyday life. One of the [...]
Emerging From Covid
I’ve been having a lot of conversations lately about how we are feeling as we emerge from the absurdity of the last year. The way we showed up in the world changed in an instant. The way we did business shifted, maybe forever. The way we socialized was distanced. From the first time I [...]